my god, moving is so friggin hard.  We've done it enough that by now we should be professionals.  The truth is, I am the professional, Pete is the amateur.  For months I am getting ready for this move.  We found the house in late march. Thought we'd be in it by May, and then proceeded to jump through hoops for a couple more months.  I packed methodically.  Bubble wrapped, taped, labeled, and stacked the shit out of everything we could live without until the move. Not only did the damn boxes get labeled, but they were even marked which room they went in.  No help from Pete, because he had some man excuse as to why he shouldn't be packing his shit too!

So the long awaited moving day came and went, and we hadn't budged from the old house, and I am sure you can imagine that I was slightly irritated.  Then, we got the phone call that all was clear, the house was finally move in ready, and we moved a family of 5 in a matter of hours, thanks to our awesome friends.

Whilst moving though, things were tossed, thrown, kicked, slammed, and our shit was everywhere.  As I was packing boxes and still trying to be organized, while every man in the universe was against that plan (or at least the men moving us!), I ran out of packing tape.  I asked Pete to get me some more, and he just handed me the roll.  Well, I had a baby in my arms, was holding a box closed getting ready to tape it, anyone with common sense would know that what I really needed at that precise moment was a piece of tape to finish the box. 

Well, I finagled a piece of tape from the roll, and stuck it to my mouth, while I closed the box again. I took (ripped) the piece of tape off my mouth to use it, and the skin on the inside of my lip peeled off with it. It hurt so bad. I could taste the blood on my tongue and it just burned.  I slid my tongue over the wound and could feel unprotected layer of skin.

Now, I don't know about you, but I personally don't know of anyone that is stupid enough to let tape rest on the inside of their mouth, sticky side down.  I didn't admit what happened to Pete for a couple days, and when I did, he laughed.  When I showed him the inside of my mouth torn and bloody, he laughed.  When I wanted sympathy for the pain, he looked at me like I was crazy, and he laughed.  Keep in mind my dear husband, when you have to get that vasectomy, once we're done having kids....I'll laugh!  When you wince in pain, I'll laugh.  When you have an ice pack on your balls, I'll laugh.  And when you have to walk bow legged to ease the pain, I'll laugh! hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Sorry, I'm just too tired to proof read this:)

Red Light Special

OK people. For those of us married or in some type of monogamous relationship, we all know there can be sexual dry spells. I won't lie, we were in one.  Keep in mind we have an almost 7 year old, a 3 year old, and a 7  month old.  Of these three wonderful, beautiful, and crazy children, 2 sleep in our bed. It is ridiculous.  I don't know how it happened, but we both hate it.  I think we're just too tired to remedy it.  I barely sleep as it is, and Pete has a brutal schedule at work. So overall, we're tired, we got kids in bed, we don't see each other a lot, and throw in their pizza nights, Mexican nights, dinner parties, sports, dance, Dr appts, grocery shopping, cleaning, cooking, laundry, play dates, social events.........sex has been put on the back burner.

Recently we've moved, and it was something we knew was going to happen, but it happened faster than we imagined, and before we knew it was moving day and there were 3 kids and boxes to balance. Our awesome friend Erin and her equally awesome mom Vickie, offered to watch the kids so we could get some things moved to the new house.  We gladly took them up on the offer and took the kids to Erin's hosue.

We packed and moved and loaded up trailers. We had 2 strong burly men helping us and we worked steadily for 3 hours.  Without kids, the 3 hours was a lot!  The big burly men left and Pete and I finished up a few last minute details before he had to get ready for work. We started to head our separate ways, him to work and me to Erin's house for the kids.

As we headed down the stairs on our departures, I had a brilliant idea to have sex, make love, do the horizontal tango, whatever you call it.  Since there were no kids, we figured it was a perfect opportunity to reconnect (quickly might I add) and have a little fun without interruptions.  The thought of making love to my husband without kids in the house was just what the Love DR ordered. So we race downstairs, rip off our clothes, fall into bed, and start the process. No sooner than we both are hot and bothered, I noticed that Mater, our cat, is sitting on the bed staring at us.  Our last cat was blind, so this was a little unnerving and we lost slight momentum.  Then, Pete looks up and standing in the window in our bedroom with his nosed pressed into the screen was a high strung Dalmatian wanting some attention too.

So, after all the hub bub and excitement of hot, racy, uninterrupted humping, we ended up with a fucking audience anyways.  I have learned a valuable lesson about keeping passion in marriage alive...do it wherever you can, as often as you can, and sometimes as fast as you can! You never know when you'll have an empty house and some alone time, and NEW RULE: Pet's don't count!

Maybe next blog I can think of a great explanation how I ripped off the inside of my lip with packing tape!