he can mutilate insects, but he can't be in a car alone......

While I love my children unconditionally and never want harm to come to them, I do find their reactions to life and calamity quite hilarious. A lot of parents react hastily or freak out when disaster strikes. Well, I’ve been through hospitalizations for fluid on the lungs and seizures, as well as ER visits for 3 sets of staples and 3 sets of stitches! This was all Peter! HAHAHA. Now you know why nothing surprises me these days. God gave me Peter first to give me patience and calmness with the rest of my children. And, it was a great plan!


So, once upon a time, I invited a girlfriend over to drink some wine. Nothing to do, nothing to plan, just drink and drink some more. Awesome plan, right? Her DD, her husband, dropped her off and said he’d be back in a few hours. Peter insisted on going back to their house to play with their son. So we swapped…drinking wife for wild child! Good for me, bad for him! When he came back to retrieve wife and return child, there were other plans. Peter was now spending the night, and he was being brought home to pack an overnight bag!

Her husband walks into the house, and sits down to BS a little. In my head I wondered where Peter was, but just assumed he went straight to his room to pack his bag. He was taking so long, I decided to go and help him pack his bag. As I walked downstairs, I noticed the door was open to the outside, so I closed it. I didn’t see Peter downstairs, I figured he got side tracked and was out chasing butterflies or mutilating grasshoppers (which I had to remind him today to leave insects intact!). So, I packed his bag and headed back upstairs to sit and converse….and drink of course.

Not 2 minutes later, the door to the outside opens and you hear;

Peter: (sob, breath, sob, breath, slight hysterics) some, some, someone, lef lef left me in the the the c-c-c-car. And, and, and (breath sob) I could could couldn’t get out (breath sob breath sob)

And, as Peter rounds the corner on the stairs, you see blood all over his face. The kid has a bloody nose.

Me: Peter, calm down. Now, what happened?

Peter: (sob sob sob) HE…(friends husband)(and very accusingly might I add) left me (sob sob sob) in the car. I tried to get out (sob sob breath breath sob) and I couldn’t figure it out.

In Peter’s defense, I had to have help to get out of their new car once too…hey, it was tricky!

Friend’s husband: OMG, I’m sorry buddy, I thought you got out and were right behind me (hence the still opened door)

Peter: I wasn’t. I don’t want to go to his house right now.

Me: (very hesitantly) Peter, did your nose start bleeding in the car

Peter: yes

Me: Did you get blood in their BRAND new car

Peter: Yes

Me: Well Peter, why did you get so freaked out about being in a car in your own driveway?

Peter: (a little whimpering and whining) I don’t know

Me: Well, you need to quit crying.

Peter: OK

So, the couple gets ready to leave. Peter decides that he is less traumatized than he thought and he would go home with them. I say my good-byes, and make the hasty decision to go out to the driveway to have a look at the blood in the car. Well, needless to say, yes, the kid got blood on their car…..

There was blood in the back, on the center console, on the dashboard, on the stereo cover, the side of both driver and passenger seat fabrics, and my absolute favorite….streaked down the passenger window, like an episode of psycho. This is where I just started to laugh. It was truly a traumatic experience for him, but for god sakes, it wasn’t so bad that he had to be hysterical and get a nose bleed over it. Poor guy…now that he can read, I have shown him where owner’s manuals are in case he gets stuck again….Just read that, sound out the words, and you’ll be just fine little buddy….and while you’re reading, let mommy know how to turn the windshield wipers on the Subaru ON.