So I'm sitting here trying to figure out what the hell I can write about my so exciting life...but to be honest the last couple days have been trying. Kaidence has decided to enter the terrible twos, 28 days before her third birthday. And Peter has decided that he can whine and be emotional every time he doesn't get his way, and Hunter, well he's just a cute baby. What I don't understand is why the kids are doing this. I pride myself on being the hard-ass mom that doesn't take their shit and doesn't allow the bullshit some other parents may allow. I demand respect and make them listen, so why have the last few days been like this? Today, Kaidence went on and on and on about abso-fucking-lutely nothing!!! First she wants to take a walk, then she scrapes her knee, and it was all down hill from there. Two fun filled hours of screaming, screeching, crying, and the occasional head bang. Hunter and I just sat there watching, not quite sure if we were watching Dr. Jekyl or Mr. Hyde. Towards the end of the two hours, all I could do was take pictures to send to her dad. Well, bad idea cause that sent her spiraling into psycho. Now don't get me wrong, I love my daughter with all my heart, but that bitch is extreme! I am actually scared of her, and whoever marries her is SCREWED big time. And you know what, she's like my twin, so a light bulb is finally starting to flicker on....I kind of feel sorry for my husband. I bet when I get all pissed over nothing he thinks "that bitch is extreme." OMG, I'm that wife. The one that the other guys are scared of and go home to their wife and thank GOD that they aren't married to me. Man, that must really suck for Pete, but maybe I should start charging a fee for making other husbands realize that their "bitch" could be worse. Like a "Browning" bitch. I bet I could bottle mine and Kaidence's bitchiness, apply for a patent, and makes tons of money. Or, it could back fire and we'd be responsible for the lawsuits people file for their "emotional trauma" upon opening the bottle. Well, I guess if I'm worried about leaving a legacy, I can stop worrying. Kaidence is well on her way to getting everything her way and blazing a trail wherever she goes....and I guess when she gets older and we can actually get along for 5 minutes we can go places and people can look and say "Man, those bitches are extreme!" Make me proud baby girl! Hahahaha, sucks to be the rest of the Universe!
And a side note...I truly love my little girl, I'm just scared at looking at a smaller version of me.
3 comments:
OMG! I have never thought of it like that. I need a drink..
HAHAHAHAHA! Let me tell you.... I was thinking the same shit a few days ago. Me and Claudia were watching Just Friends and the guy freaked out in the car and started doing crazy shit and throwing stuff. I looked over and was like, "dude I act like that". Claudia was like what?????? Yeah I am totally that bitchy wife that throws stuff and acts all crazy. My husband is usually looking at me like I'm growing horns out of my forehead and now it all makes sense.
That is a scary thought. I don't even WANT to know what mini-ME will look like! Keep on keepin on, though, Amber. I assure you, you're doing great. (As if you needed the encouragement from a mother of a poodle! HAHA.)
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